Jesus in the House

Some visitors to House of the beloved (HOTB) identify as Christians and may struggle to integrate the practices of HOTB with their Christian faith. This Q&A is an attempt to facilitate that integration through shared reflection.

To start, the practices at HOTB are trans-spiritual, meaning they can be integrated into all religious traditions. While diverse, they share several core principles:

• Prioritizing direct experience over conceptual understanding.

• Emphasizing behavior and embodiment over the verbal expression of truth.

• Deriving morality from selfless availability rather than an externally imposed framework of right and wrong.

• Focusing on "not doing" (silencing the mind’s reactivity).

These principles are similar to the ideas of the 17th-century Christian Quietist movement, particularly as articulated by Miguel de Molinos in The Spiritual Guide (1675) and Madame Jeanne Guyon in Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ (late 1600s). These writings fully elaborate on these perspectives from a Christian point of view.

With this as our basis, let’s address some core challenges for Christians at HOTB.

What is the relationship between religious traditions?

Question: Do they describe the same fundamental experience in different languages, or do they refer to entirely different realities?

Response: Diverse religious and spiritual traditions use culture-specific concepts and stories to describe and enable a similar psychophysical transformation. On a conceptual level, they may seem contradictory or mutually exclusive. However, I believe the underlying, pre-conceptual, experiential processes are similar, almost identical.

Brown and Engler (1986) illustrated a map of these underlying processes by synthesizing Mahamudra (Tibetan Mahayana Buddhism), Visuddhimagga (Pali Theravadin Buddhist), and Yoga Sutras (Sanskrit Hindu tradition). I believe this map can be extended to Christianity as well. For example, the Christian desire to empty oneself and become small to be an instrument of God’s will is quite aligned with the emptiness practices in Mahayana Buddhism. This, however, is only evident on an experiential level, not on a conceptual one.

How do we approach the dialogue between traditions?

Question: Do we seek harmony, or do traditions co-exist in their uniqueness—even if this creates tension?

Response: At HOTB, the proposal is to transcend conceptual disagreements by practicing together. This means not debating declarative truths, but rather embodying our (different) belief systems and expressing them in how we relate to others. We call this practice "being different together": deeply connecting with others by fully expressing your own way of being human.

This is only possible if we allow others to express their way of being human and are willing to extend ourselves to simultaneously support our own and another’s existential development. We refer to this willingness as "love."

Any ideology that restricts others in their human expression is not sustainable or possible at HOTB. Instead of trying to limit or change others, the invitation is to be with "what is" and use the discomfort of being different as a guide toward deeper self-recognition. A guiding question might be, "What makes it difficult for me to be with what is?"

What is the relevance of atonement?

Question: How does atonement relate to the ideas and practices of HOTB?

Response: Atonement in Christian theology refers to how human beings are reconciled with God, especially through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

At HOTB, we avoid conceptual truth-discussions and focus on behavioral consequences. All beliefs are welcome, as long as you embody them fully without limiting others and are willing to have your beliefs challenged by the presence and relationships of others.

With that in mind, we can relate to the divine in three ways (as described by Ken Wilbur in Integral Spirituality):

• "You": A relationship with a personal other (e.g., in Christianity).

• "It": Relating to something else, like awakened awareness (e.g., in Buddhism).

• "I": Realizing that I am an expression of the divine (e.g. in non-dual tantric Shaivism).

Atonement only makes sense when the divine is perceived as a "you"—a personal other. In Mahayana Buddhism ("it") and Tantric Buddhism ("I"), the idea of separation (in Christian terms, that we are separate from God) is considered illusory and the root cause of suffering. The illusion of separation causes craving and clinging, which brings about the illusion of a substantial self that needs to defend itself against a threatening universe.

The Buddhist proposal is to cut through the illusion of separation by seeing through your mind’s constructions and stopping the artificial activity of constructing altogether. This results in the dissolution of the boundaries between self and other, engendering an experience of "oneness"—or, in more Christian terms, being one with God or filled with the Holy Spirit.

Question: In this vision, why did Jesus have to die?

Response: His death is a beautiful embodiment of selfless surrender to a life expressed through him. Jesus demonstrated the possibility of staying present as selfless, awakened awareness (in Christian terms, God) even in circumstances of torture and death. His example of staying faithful to what one holds to be true, even in the hardest of circumstances, shows a way for all of us to emulate.

How do we avoid "domesticating" Jesus?

Question: How do we avoid adjusting or selecting his words to fit our frame of mind? Can he keep his own voice, and how does that work?

Response: This question reminds me of Jesus’ words: “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). I interpret this as an invitation to see or experience the truth through a living connection with him.

Connection as a path toward self-insight and self-recognition is at the heart of HOTB. In the absence of a shared, declarative truth, the risk of domestication or appropriation disappears. If we can see every interaction with the "other" as mirroring our connection with the "Other," these practices can lead to a primordial "meeting"—with Jesus, if you like—in the intimacy of our lived experience.

Universality vs. Particularity

Question: How do we reconcile the tension between the universality of the Christ (present in all things) and the particularity of Jesus (the man from Nazareth who, according to Christian tradition, became human in a specific place and time)?

Response: The specifics and idiosyncrasies of Jesus’ life are part of the Christian faith; as such, they are not yet an expression of an embodied presence. My question, in turn, is this: How does the latter influence the way you behave and relate to others?

In Indo-Tibetan Buddhism (one of the lineages we follow in our meditation workshops), they distinguish between the Dharmakaya (awakened awareness that permeates everything—Christians would call this God) and the Nirmanakaya(the emanations of the Dharmakaya as physical forms and bodies—Christians would put the human Jesus here). From this viewpoint, put in Christian terms, God continuously expresses Herself as our lived realities.

This view, however, does not affirm the uniqueness of Jesus. Neither does his historical context. Some specifics of Jesus’ life were not uncommon during and even before his time, for example:

• Virgin births: Perseus, Huitzilopochtli, Attis, Genghis Khan, Krishna, Horus, Mercury, Romulus, etc.

• Incarnations: Avatars of Hindu gods, al-Hakim bi-Amr Allah, reincarnated lamas/tulkus that are emanations of the Buddha. Numerous pharaohs and emperors were also seen as divine incarnations.

• Resurrections: Tammuz in Mesopotamia, Osiris in Egypt, Adonis in Greece, Satyavan & Savriti in India, Bodhidharma & Puha in Buddhism, and more.

• Miracles: Including walking on water (Orion), healing (Aesculapius), etc.

At HOTB, we relate not through beliefs or declarative truths, but through shared presence, connection, and practice. All beliefs are considered constructs of the mind. In our communal life, they are relevant only if they influence the way you are present and express your humanity. Belief systems are often exposed as defensive mechanisms to provide security, even though most religions actually point toward defenceless surrender—fully trusting as you fall backward into Her/His hands.

Morality and "Sin"

Question: How do I combine Christian morality with the HOTB monastic rule to "let go of your ideas of right and wrong"? What about the concept of "sin"?

Response: The proposal to let go of our ideas of right and wrong reflects a prioritization of direct experience over conceptual understanding. This does not mean "do whatever you want." Rather, it proposes sinking so deeply into the essence of your being that the right action follows automatically. In the words of the Quietists, this means to completely abandon to the will of God and let God lead the way.

The concept of "sin" carries the desire to become a better human being—for Christians, this means aligning more closely with God’s will. But what is the most efficient way to get there?

Consider two approaches:

• Approach 1: Stigmatize every deviation from God’s path as evil. Use shame and guilt to force behavioral and thought changes. Systematically undermine self-esteem and self-love by attributing it to an intrinsic corruption of the soul and body, and use mortification and self-torturing techniques to distance oneself from everything sensual.

• Approach 2: Consider everything that creates suffering as resulting from ignorance and unskillfulness caused by an undisciplined mind. Provide training to teach the mind how to listen. Become more subtle in your perception to notice how some behaviors lead to insight and joy, while others lead to suffering and alienation.

These two options resemble the distinction in Achievement Goal Theory between performance goals (connected with a fixed mindset) and learning goals (connected with a growth mindset). Most studies show a positive link between a growth mindset, well-being, and sustainable behavioral change. (to be elaborated on...)

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